I grew up in the Episcopal church and was fascinated by faith and spirituality from a young age. I completed the appropriate faith awards in Girl Scouts as I grew up, and when going through confirmation classes as a young teenager, I was even asked to teach the class because what we were studying had already been covered in my Girl Scout awards. I took to heart what I was learning, and always wanted to learn more.

My father was an immigrant and made sure his only daughter went to a women’s college without the distraction from men. I fell in love with, and eventually married, a midshipman from the Naval Academy who was also an Episcopalian. This was during the mid-1960s, and my view of marriage and the dreams I had in life were very traditional. I was overjoyed at the birth of a son, however life quickly took a turn when my husband left me just 16 months later. At age 27, I found myself a single mother, finding myself thrown into the “real world.” I began working, and at this time began what would be a 37-year career working with four Girl Scout councils. I was blessed to work for an organization  for which the promise recited by all members started with “On my honor, I will try to serve God…”

This time of my life was challenging. Things as simple as getting a credit card were extremely difficult without a husband to “prove” worthiness. I learned a lot. It was at this time in my life, learning on my own and gaining my own independence, that I became steadfast in my commitment to ensure that all young people had equal access to using the gifts the Holy Spirit had given them.

My personal spiritual journey has led me from the Episcopal church to ELCA congregations in several states and finally, in my retirement, to the Catholic Church. In addition to becoming Catholic, I am now also a professed secular Franciscan.

As a part of my current spiritual life, I served as the co-chair for the Synod process at Our Lady of Nazareth parish in Roanoke, VA. Motivated by our experiences during the synodal process, I gathered a planning team of women from the parish,  ages 40-87, and together we formed a group called “Women of Nazareth.” Our hope was to uplift women in our parish and it was through this mission together and a young woman in the parish that we found Discerning Deacons. This year, we will celebrate our second anniversary with a daylong women’s retreat on October 19 entitled “Biblical Women in Action Through the Ages” with a Discerning Deacons team member as the presenter.

I have been a Girl Scout for seventy years, and have spent my working career breaking down barriers and lifting up opportunities for girls to reach their potential in traditional and non-traditional opportunities. In 1972 I worked with the owners of the Burger King franchises and the US Naval base in Charleston, SC to have girls recycle newspaper and aluminum cans. In 1978 I wrote programs on sexual abuse awareness for girls ages 5-18 at a council in Michigan. I have always sought out ways to expand the horizons for girls and young women, and I am certainly glad to be a part of the Church’s journey to do this now, as well!

Before converting to Catholicism, I was involved with Voices of Faith, an interfaith non-profit in the Roanoke Valley started by Our Lady of Nazareth by Monsignor Joseph Lehman under the initiative of Bishop Walter Francis Sullivan. It is the only surviving interfaith program of that initiative in the Diocese of Richmond. For me, the synodal process starts with the belief that, because we are all created in God’s image, every human being has value and worth. Therefore, the journey that has brought them to this moment should be honored by being truly present and listening. This synodal process is truly listening to “the other” without judging right or wrong. My experience with Discerning Deacons is that the same process is being used. As we learn to listen better, we will continue to change attitudes and structures in the Church and in our lives and communities more broadly.

It is meaningful to reflect upon my journey and the many “Phoebes” who have accompanied me on my journey into the Church, my journey as a lay Franciscan, my journey in synodality and uplifting women in the Church. I dream of a Church that can be a moving force in serving all people and helping each person recognize and use the gifts given by the Holy Spirit. “Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven” can only be accomplished if the gifts of ALL people, regardless of gender, age, race and ethnicity, are included and welcomed.